Sporadic things and Melou's anniversary

I forgot how my colleagues and I came to the topic today but I mentioned that I have been having trouble sleeping. One of the SAs came back to his desk at that point in time and was also asked if this insomnia issue affects him too. Surprisingly, he said yes and that 1am to 3am are timings during which he is most awake. I am not that bad but I can see where he's coming from. Maybe it's a lawyer thing. A 1,001 things running through our heads, constantly worrying that we might have missed out on one detail or the other.

So I am turning back to this blog for some solace. An attempt to wind down at the end of the day. To stare at the computer one more time after a long day of staring at the comp. Hair of the dog style if you will.

Did a 6.5km run today. Saw myself in the mirror at the gym yesterday and can't believe that huge spare tyre around me. Have to work it off by hook or by crook and hopefully, though not realistically, in time for V and I's Phuket trip in October. In any case, I'm gonna be turning 30 next year and I like to do so feeling fit and strong.

In other news, it was Melou's death anniversary a couple of days back. Can't believe it's been a year already and yet that very day still haunts me. Lately, V has taken to using the electro-magnetic machine thing and only in the shower earlier, I realised that a wave of uneasiness washes over me whenever I see or hear about that machine. I realise it's coz it was around the time when Melou had that fall and could not walk, her last few days.. She would cry and cry non stop but whenever we switch on the machine and place her on it, she calms down and falls into a gentle rest.

I completely forgive my mum from dropping her but I still cannot believe she was taken away from me in that manner. My companion, my best friend of 14 years, taken away from me and I miss her so much. I miss her running to me and lying on my lap each time I lie down and how she uses her nose to nudge and lift my hand so that I will pat and scratch her. Melou, you're the most loving dog any one could ever ask for and I hope you're happy in doggy heaven. I love you.

Sigh.. okay, that wasn't as "winding down" as I hope it would be but it was therapeutic to let the tears flow once more. There's very little left that I want to say so I shall end off here,  abrupt as it may be.